Playing around

I'm so excited! I've learned how to upload (or download...can't remember the term) photos! And so here is my latest knitting project: a sweater for my soon-to-join-us Cincinnati grand baby.

Please note: Hand painted yarn. What every stylish newborn is wearing these days.

That's better....

....or at least less green.

Time for a new picture

I like this picture of me....Scout thinks my arms are stretched out because I'm sending her a hug. (True and also they are stretched out because otherwise when I take a picture of myself, all I get is the pores of my nose.) So this photo is just a bit special to me. However, I am noticing that green tinge more and more. Time to download more photos and turn my skin back to a more normal hue. No more Grandma from Emerald City.

On another note, I had my first school study trip. We took 72 fifth graders downtown to do research at the library. A good time with just the usual bumps in the road (nice play on words after that bus ride)....one child telling me all about how my gray hair ages me, another telling me all he knew which was a lot about his personal favorites Attila the Hun and Genghis Khan, another few boys having to be stopped from assaulting one another's privaties on the bus (oh, the back of the bus is an unholy place). We timed it well because I definitely can use this three day weekend for recovery!

August

I'm just sitting here thinking that I am not a fan of August. When those crickets or cicadas or whatever they are start making that insect sound, it sends me into an August funk. And speaking of insects, I see bugs in August that I never see earlier or later in the year. Maybe they are necessary to Mother Nature but I think they are nasty.

We start back to school even though it is barely midsummer. I love teaching and once I'm in my school year routine, I'm comfortable and happy. But the transition is hell. Being in two schools stinks at this time of year. Setting up two classrooms, two schedules, working with two principals and two staffs....this taxes my limited organizational skills. This year I sent out my list of students and my schedule 3 times at one school and never at the other. I'm blaming it on Xanax madness...

There's not enough rain and my garden is thirsty but I'm too hot and pooped out from adjusting to school to even have empathy. Anything that survives August in my garden is a trooper. If I survive August, I'm a trooper.

And don't get me started on why I don't like September......

School: Day 2

Much better!

First day of school

This would be a lot easier without the irritation and cognitive slowness. I need my brain back.

Tomorrow will be better.....

That's all folks.....

Today was the first day in 15 years without Xanax. I am unspeakably proud.

All day I kept checking my pocket to make sure that my pill holder was there. I didn't realize how often I do that...but now I can stop. No need to carry meds around with me.

I wanted to be done before school starts and it starts tomorrow. I'm not actually done. I still need to get off of the transition meds and my GABA ain't where it should be. But I no longer take Xanax. That's it.

Ain't much left of that little white pill

We are back from Lake Michigan and on the day we left Saugutuck, I did it. I cut that last little Xanax pill/day in half and am now down to .125mg or half a pill a day.

That is like nothing....and yet it is definitely something to my body. I can and do cry at the drop of a hat, I can't remember words, I am confused. Today I was sitting in my car at a red light. The light turned green and I sat there thinking, "Green light. Now that means something. Why does that ring a bell?" Motorists behind me gave me the reminder I needed but this is a little scary. Especially when we are dealing with Dad and Minnette and dementia. Move over old folks and make way for the latest member of the Can't Remember Shit Club.